A NEW ME?

Well here i am at a (LHD-in-wimmin-only-space) happening again. I notice that there are a lotta wimmin here, some i know others i don't. Good to see so many different wimmin but i don't know i kinda knot up around so many i don't know,but i gonna give myself and them a chance, i will stay (whew). The food looks really good and i am really hungry, glad i don't have to wait for everyone else to start eating, I'll get me a plate and go sit in a corner till talk gets started. So i grabbed myself and sat in a corner i thought was far away,everybody is getting food and finding places to sit. A very friendly womon sat next to me and introduced herself, i am OK now,breathing coming back to where it should be,so i smiled and introduced myself. We are all sitting somewhere eating and talking, i wonder should i bring up my dreams or talk about the food? Didn't have to wonder long there is this womon first time i have seen her,talking about the psychological impact of being in a room full of ONLY WOMEN, almost everyone in the room became intensely quite,one womon ask her what do you mean only wimmin ? she said well there are only women here. I said no that's not so there are cats here, she acted as though she thought i was making an attempt at being funny, but i wasn't, there are cats here. Another womon said yes we are wimmin only here, this is a conscious decision on our part, many of us here are lesbians, the womon said I'm not, before i realized it i said how sad for you, and with that comment she gave me her most un-approving look. Now what the hell is an un-approving look,well i know what one looks like of about whatever. Well anyway the womyn continue to explain why we were here and why we were here with wimmin only. I became annoyed and expressed my annoyance, i said i agreed with Gertrude when she said explanation is composition, the woman ask me and i repeat who on earth is Gertrude dear? I said Gertrude Stein in her book how to write, the woman just look at me and said o how cute. Can you f...... imagine how cute? Should i leave now nope wont allow any patriarchal do-do cause me to leave a (LHD-in-wimmin-only-space), but didn't the other wimmin hear it? Well! i said to myself u just wait till she lays something on one of them then i betcha they will want to talk about it, maybe its just my paranoia. Maybe just jumpie cuz of my visions. One of the wimmin went back to explaining and i asked why should so much time be spent on explaining to anyone why we were and who and how we were? another womon said that yes explanation is composition and she was explaining and composing the surrounding for some one who was unaware. So she began to explain and compose again,and this went on for about 35mins, and finally a womon said hey this is enough can we get on with talking about something of interest to us now, she looked at the woman who all of the conversion had been directed too and said hope what we have said to you helps understand what we are about, and if not perhaps as you come more often you will understand. You know i remember one time a long time ago a womon that i was sitting in a cr group with said, these are the kind of women lesbians have to watch out for, cause knowing or not they always bring the man with them in them on them, i did not really understand what she meant then but i do now. Well anyway another womon said i have had a helluva time trying not to eat one of my favorite things to eat pork chops. I wanted to break out a big laugh but did not, i said to myself i wonder if that woman stirred up pork chop feelings in her by noting that we were only women, so i asked her if that was so? she said what a weird thing to say i said no not really since to me when she said the psychological impact of being with only women, was something a woman would say, who is more often with men and the hidden lesbian in each of us could hear and see that, and that triggered a desire for meat in this case pork chops which are really pig behinds. The womon said she did not think this was it since she had had a desire to eat pork chops before she met this woman. Well i don't know. They all started talking about their favorite parts of animals that they like to eat. My mothers voice came into my head, U MUST LEARN PATIENCE ! Well this is not the conversations i expected but this is what it is. I begin to think to myself did i make a enemy today sure did not intend to. Yes there is still a lot for me to learn about myself and others.